Shit Lower East Siders Say

Posted on: January 20th, 2012 at 6:44 am by

Yup, we went there.  Being glued to media outlets as we are, it’s nearly impossible to avoid the “Shit people say” meme.  And even though it’s already jumped the proverbial shark, the New York version of same was nevertheless worth a gander.  So, in the spirit of this tired concept, we polled our Facebook friends for a followup of sorts.  It morphed into quite a list.

Herewith, the best of our crowdsourced “Shit Lower East Siders Say” (in no particular order):

  • “Is the F train not running again? F#%*ing MTA.”
  • “I never go above 14th Street.”
  • “Whats that fucking stench? Oh yeah, it’s Chinatown on a 90 degree day.”
  • “Theres a LINE?!!”
  • “Ugh, it’s raining”/”ugh, it’s snowing.”
  • “Oh hey sorry i’m late i was at yoga with Lady Gaga.”
  • “Doughnut Plant is out of creme brulee donuts already?! But it’s only 9am!”
  • ‎”Wanna go occupy after Pianos?”
  • “Gee, I’m so excited to have to wait in line for 3 hours tomorrow just to eat brunch.”
  • “Katz’s is SO overrated.”
  • “This neighborhood is totally safe. Those gunshots were like two blocks that way.”
  • “What’s with all the horse shit?”
  • “I can’t believe [this old place] is closing!!!”
  • “I can only go out around here during the week.”
  • “This is where I used to score.”

Be sure to add your own variations in the comments!

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  • Private

    “Katz’s is SO overrated” Only a midwesterner would say this. Katz’s is the temple of the G-ds.

  • Those are what Shit [the new] Lower East
    Siders Say
    , at least 99% of what’s on that list, but then
    again, probably 99% of LESiders nowadays are “new” LESiders

    as for the 1%, an old school LESider would say are:

    “F*ckin’ B&T’s…hipsters…Jersey Shorers…”

    “Hijo de la gran puta!”

    “Stay to your right.”

    “Coño”

    “Rent is too damn high.”

    “I’m walkin’ here.”

    “Pendejo!”

    “$10 for a meatball sandwich!” (and variations “$5 for coffee!”….”$20 for a
    cocktail!”, (but then again a LESider old-timer wouldn’t be caught dead
    in these joints)

  • Guest

    tenement tenement tenement

  • Kira

    “Who hangs out above Delancey???”

  • Azra

    “Shit transplants say.”

  • Carol Ann Rutz

    “Fucking Bridge and Tunnel crowd…”
    “Ummmm, Veselka…”
    “You know… when Jean Caffiene worked there.”
    “Let’s go to Robots, Carol Black is on the door.”
    “Where’s my balsa?”
    “He’s got a blade, run…run…”

  • Alex Simon

    The native Lower East Sider would probably say or at least use to say the following:

    “It’s pronounced ‘how-stin’, not ‘Hew-stin’ like the city!!!”
    “I want that toy at luckys! buy it for me now or i’m throwing a tantrum” (not literally but you get me)
    “Lets play manhunt! 8 block radius only!”
    “I’m hungry, lets go to clinton. I want an alcapurria”
    “I’m gettin a fade at the cubano” (allen st)
    “Me da uno tamarindo y otro de limon”
    “Coco, cherry, rainbow!!! Una peseta!”

    “I’m going to 56, and you?
    “I got into 25” “Screw seward park”

    “Yo lets go to Forsyth, I’ll play you in ball.”
    “Hi Mr purple!”
    “Those allen boys are at it again”
    “Im gonna get me a slice at Rosario’s”
    “I got christmas gifts at Ryan Nena, yay!”
    “I got my kicks at Nort” (Eldridge)
    “I don’t wanna go to university settlement anymore, I’m grown!”
    “What color is your jawbreaker? Mine’s green!” (Bought from Economy Candy of course)

    I miss the old lower east side, when it felt like an actual neighborhood without the generic chains and wealthy snobs. Of course that doesn’t only apply to LES but to NYC in general.